The Different Types of Grief: Understanding What You’re Feeling

When we lose someone or something important, grief doesn’t follow a one-size-fits-all pattern. If you’ve ever found yourself wondering, “Am I grieving the right way?” or “What type of grief am I experiencing?”, you’re not alone. Understanding the different types of grief can help normalize your feelings and guide you toward the support you need.

At Changing Tides Therapy in Ottawa, we help individuals navigate the complex waves of grief with care, understanding, and evidence-based approaches. Here’s a closer look at some of the most recognized types of grief.

1. Anticipatory Grief

Anticipatory grief happens before a loss occurs. This is common when someone is facing a terminal illness or an expected life transition, like moving away or retiring. You may feel sadness, anxiety, or even guilt as you imagine the impending loss.

Signs you might be experiencing anticipatory grief:

• Feeling anxious or fearful about the future

• Experiencing sadness or tearfulness before the loss

• Trying to “prepare” emotionally for what’s coming

While it can be painful, anticipatory grief can also give people time to process, say goodbye, and make meaningful memories before the loss.

2. Complicated Grief

Sometimes grief becomes intense, persistent, and difficult to manage, even months or years after the loss. This is known as complicated grief. Unlike typical grief, it can interfere with your ability to function day-to-day.

Signs of complicated grief include:

• Persistent longing or preoccupation with the deceased

• Feeling numb or disconnected from life

• Difficulty accepting the loss

Complicated grief often benefits from professional support. Therapists can provide strategies and tools to process the grief safely and move toward healing.

3. Disenfranchised Grief

Disenfranchised grief occurs when society doesn’t recognize your loss as legitimate. This can make you feel isolated or judged for grieving. Examples include:

• Losing a pet or a miscarriage

• Ending a relationship that others “didn’t see coming”

• Experiencing a loss tied to stigma (like certain types of addiction or estranged family relationships)

If your grief feels invisible or unsupported, know that your feelings are valid. Finding a therapist or support group that acknowledges your loss can make a significant difference.

4. Situational Grief

Situational grief happens after unexpected or life-changing events, such as:

• Job loss or financial instability

• Moving to a new city

• Major health changes or accidents

Situational grief can feel intense because the event disrupts your life and expectations. Unlike bereavement, the loss is not about death but about the loss of the way life used to be.

Moving Through Grief

No matter the type of grief you’re experiencing, it’s important to know that there is no “right” way to grieve. Grief is personal, unique, and non-linear. You may move between these types, experience multiple forms at once, or feel aspects of grief that don’t fit neatly into one category.

At Changing Tides Therapy, we provide compassionate, individualized support for grief, whether you’re in Ottawa or connecting with us online across Ontario. Our therapists help you understand your feelings, develop coping strategies, and find a path toward healing.

If you’re struggling with grief, reach out today. You don’t have to navigate it alone.